Thursday, December 31, 2015

The Overlook Theatre Reviews: Elves, Starring Dan Haggerty

of 6 viewers "Liked" "Elves" (1989, USA)
Here's what the citizens of the Overlook Theatre had to say:

The Berkeley Blazer - "My viewing of Elves felt like watching an inebriated gorilla suddenly execute a beautiful dance pose or pirouette. So much of the component parts of this film are made of the classic faux-bad movie stuff that would fit right in with those mock-trailers in the theatrical release of Grindhouse, and yet Elves uses those very blocks to compose an amazing, herried Christmas experience. While it's hilarious that Grizzly Adams is the main character, the humble hero charm of his performance is genuinely endearing. Nazi car chases and peeping goblinoids start with a giggle then lead to a shout of awe at the sheer bravura at the spectacle unfolding before your eyes. Whatever this movie was supposed to be, its makers put a lot of love into making the images on screen grab your attention. The hammiest characters are alive with an energy that never feels forced despite their obviously tongue-in-cheek delivery. I would watch Elves every Christmas." - 4 Stars

KillDozer - "I waited an entire year to see my bootleg VHS rip of Elves with my fellow monster kids and it was worth it! First off, the film starts like the intro to The Craft with some wannabe witches who dub themselves the Anti-Christmas, bringing back an evil "elf" through some botched ancient ceremony. I don't want to give away anything since the holiday magic is hidden throughout the film's insanely all over the place script. Writer Jeffrey Mandel has made a name for himself writing the best of the worst 80's sci-fi like Cyber C.H.I.C. and Firehead but this is by far his best most entertaining work. A true straight to VHS holiday classic that I believe is a must watch tradition during the holiday season. How do you even begin to describe the greatness of Grizzly Adams vs Nazi scientists during Christmas?!! Oh, I'm sure you are wondering about the Elves and where they come into play. Well they (or it) is one of at least 6 plots/sub plots that are thrown into this fruit cake collage of a creature feature/action flick. Major points for practical creature effects and an awesome explosion! Make Elves the focus of your next holiday get together and you won't be disappointed as it in no way promotes peace on earth or good will toward men." - 3 Stars (Collection worthy and a new Christmas tradition)

Book Wyrm - "A cat is killed, there's incestuous rape, and Nazis are back. This movie did not put me in the Christmas spirit to say the least." - 1 Star

Lord Battle  - "With a name like Elves, you'd expect a Ghoulies film tailored for the holidays. Thankfully this film is much more bizarre. In fact, so much happens in Elves that when a young girls cat is shoved into a bag and cat-napped, then haphazardly drowned in a toilet by the girls own mother, not to mention for reasons too dumb to explain, this ludicrous and hilarious moment still manages to be forgotten in the mayhem that follows. If you're the type that loves VHS madness this is a must see." - 3.5 Stars

Huntress - "I was so sure I knew what this movie would be about just based on the title, but I was wrong in the best way possible; the movie I imagined was pretty damn boring compared to the one I actually saw. The acting may not have been the best but no amount of conviction in an actor's voice could get you to take this movie that seriously. It was too much fun not to laugh with the insanity and campy effects in Elves, it's definitely worthy of an annual screening." - 3.5 Stars

Math Mage -"Nazi sorcerers attempt to revive anti-**** horrors in a plot to take over the world! Why they thought half-elves would be the master race, their terrible even if they get skill bonus for free. Everyone knows dwarves are the master race!" - 4 Stars

The Overlook Theatre Final Rating*
(Below is for after you've seen the film)

Elves has been discussed a number of times as both the worst and best film to watch during the holidays. I honestly feel that if you are reading this without having viewed the film, you are doing yourself a huge disservice. Grab a couple of buddies and hit YouTube, the film in its entirety is here. So instead of trying to dissect this film down into some major themes or trying to understand Jeff Mandel's subtext about the holidays, I've decided to share a couple videos relating to the film and what might be the lamest listed "Goof" on IMDB and of course it's concerning Elves.

Note that 0 of 1 people found this interesting

I love when film is slightly edited to create a very a large change in subject, genre, or tone and I somehow happened to stumble upon a little edit that does just that to one of Elves' lamer moments. Again, you'll understand this better having seen the film, although it's definitely not a requirement.

This next video is to help give some weight to how huge Dan Haggerty's career actually was back in the day. Below is the entire full 2 hour Dean Martin Celebrity Roast of Dan Haggerty and if you watch long enough you just might see Orsen Welles take a shot a him...

- Lord Battle

*Based on the star ratings turned in by character reviewers, others viewed and got to "Dislike" or "Like" but that does not effect the rating.

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